The Reality of Life on a Cruise Ship

Hollywood films and travel ads make it seem like cruises will be nothing but paradise day after paradise day. Although this can happen, it’s not the default experience that everyone has. Partly this is due to the overhyped expectations. People feel that it should be perfect. If it doesn’t reach that (hard to attain) level, then they get upset – usually at the overworked crew staff. 

If you’ve ever lived in a dark room without windows, then you know what Einstein found out all those years ago – time is relative. Without the sun to wake you up at 6 am or let you know it’s nighttime at 7 pm, time gets a bit tricky. 

Tours are the highlights of the cruise. Sure, the giant boat with all its amenities is fantastic, but exploring a beautiful tropical island is much better! Cruise ships generally stop for a few hours at each port to let the passengers join a tour.

Not to say that some tours aren’t great, but most of them are a far cry from what’s promised in the advertising. First off, it takes a while to get to the beach or mountain itself. Usually, the traveling is done in overcrowded buses with the same people who might have annoyed you on the ship.

Cruises are often sold as idyllic getaways where young people can sit by the pool, sip on colorful cocktails, and dance the night away. The image people have in their heads is a little like the picture below – younger people drinking, smiling, and flirting.

It’s true that there are special cruises that specifically cater to a younger demographic. Those are perfect for the Hollywood fantasy described above. However, if you were to choose a cruise at random, it’s more likely that the passengers would be in their 60s rather than their 20s.

Cruises and beaches go together like peanut butter and jelly (or jam if that’s your, well, jam). After the stress of working most of the year, cruise ship passengers dream of lounging on a tropical beach with a mixed drink in hand, watching as the waves go in and out.

Although the words “secluded beach” and “cruise ship” are linked in the public imagination, they rarely go together in the real world. That’s because cruise ships are full of people and when they stop all those people rush to the beach.

Although working on a cruise ship can be a great way to meet other people your age and travel around the world, it would be naive to assume that the work is easy. Oftentimes, the shifts are long and the days off are short.

It may sound surprising, but there are quite a lot of angry passengers at sea. Some passengers expect to be catered to and pampered to every minute of every day of their cruise. When this doesn’t happen, they get angry.

Although some cruise ship realities are unpleasant, others are downright perfect. Case in point: the tweet below. Imagine the only problem you have is choosing between a sunbathing session on a beautiful beach or an afternoon nap in a hammock. Sounds like paradise.

Despite having so little closet space, workers do manage to misplace their clothing sometimes. It should be obvious where things are stored, but maybe that tiny little name tag is harder to keep track of!

Stomach bugs are not really a crowd favorite in the best of times, but what about when everyone is trapped at sea? No fun, not even a little!

So with all that free food, workers must be gaining weight like crazy! Hard to limit oneself at the buffet, right?

While passengers probably spend the majority of their time in restaurants, clubs, and pools onboard a luxury cruise, there are a few things beneath the deck that ensures it all runs smoothly. What giant vessel at sea would be complete without its own morgue and jail?

When thinking about a restroom on a luxurious cruise ship, this is the picture that will enter most people’s minds. We fantasize about being surrounded by windows overlooking the sea, in a bright room, ideally featuring a private hot tub to relax in. 

Most passengers find their bathroom to be uncomfortably small. They’re lucky if they get a tiny portal window, but the view is the least of their problems. It’s difficult to do everything you need to do in such a cramped space, and for couples, there’s no hope of being able to take showers together.  

We're guaranteed many attractions and excitements on the boat. In the evenings, after supper, there should be live music, magic shows, comedy, and all sorts of other theatrics. This image, for instance, shows a Rascal Flatts show on a ship with an elated crowd and an exuberant atmosphere. 

Reality check: the live show presumably will not be from a famous performer but a striving singer who couldn't book a gig elsewhere. It’s best not to rely on the live show to be the most awesome aspect of the cruise. Those passengers who do are in for a harsh surprise. 

Regardless of which cruise we're going on, we expect a casino that could match the best in Vegas. The pool may have been a mistake, and the live show was a failure, but the casino never fails. 

The rooms are a lot more modest than anticipated because of the restricted space on the ship. The rooms, the lounge areas, and the common zones occupy the vast majority of the space inside the boat, so very little is left for the casino. 

Hollywood motion pictures consistently make everything look so charming, including the most unimpressive of occasions, such as getting onto a plane or a boat. They cut out the part where we need to stand in interminably long queues, go through tedious check-in procedures, and trust that nothing will go wrong. 

On many occasions, boarding happens inside a terminal. Sometimes it does occur under a brilliant, radiant sky. However, that makes it imperative to pack sunscreen in your tote since you’ll be out in the blazing sun for some time. 

Cruise ships have elegant names, usually incorporating words like queen, princess, or anything that has to do with royalty. We anticipate that the ship should be nothing short of sublime, lavish, and enormous. However, there's a trick to this aspect of the ships – the more elegant the name, the less regal the ship often ends up being. 

Not all cruise ships look as glitzy as the brochure suggests. They’re normally not as large, and they don’t always get to park on colorful seashores with the sunlight glinting perfectly off the white deck. 

The climate is a key factor in any excursion, regardless of whether it's a summer escape or a skiing trip. It is significantly more important on a cruise, where you go through the vast majority of the day outside. Regardless of how incredible the ships are, and how extraordinary the company, in the end, everything comes down to the climate. Terrible weather really can ruin your dream cruise. 

If a storm moves in when you're on a cruise, you can’t really tap out. There's no spot to run since you're stuck on a moving boat. So, you're compelled to remain inside, either inside your room, the packed common zones, or the miserable casino. 

Cruise ships frequently offer a lot of activities on board to keep you constantly entertained. If you're the sort of individual who gets bored of spending hours by the pool simply lounging around and sitting idle, stress not. Cruise ships guarantee an assortment of adventures like water skiing, cinemas, and even indoor skydiving.

Onboard activities can be very costly and they are often booked out instantly. This makes it essential for passengers to plan ahead and book the things they want to try. Otherwise, there’s little else to do but take part in the less popular activities, like watermelon carving. 

Nothing says "getaway" like a relaxing spa. We travel to unwind, loosen up, abandon our difficulties, and leave work stress behind. There’s no greater method to unwind than a decadent spa day and a soothing massage that leaves you invigorated and revived. 

This spa doesn't look like a calming place. In fact, it looks like the opposite. It seems like it would make us considerably tenser. Those lounges look like they’re made of stone. 

Maybe the greatest benefit of a cruise is the opportunity to be out in the midst of the ocean where we may be able to catch a brief look at its mystical untamed life. While there are no guarantees, we're trusting that if we invest sufficient time on deck, we may see sharks, dolphins, and other ocean animals that we don't frequently encounter. 

If a passenger is hoping to see fascinating fish on their trip, they will likely be in for a whole lot of disappointment. Odds are they will not see dolphins perform their mesmerizing acrobatics. Indeed, they are highly unlikely to experience any novel encounters. From high up on the deck of a cruise ship, a person has little hope of being in the right place at the right time to witness a sea creature breaking the surface. 

There's nothing more charming than watching the sun sink over the horizon on a warm night with the person you love, isn't that so? This scene is common in romantic films and novels, however, don't go searching for this idea of a whimsical date on a cruise ship. 

Tracking down a private spot on the deck where you could have a peaceful moment with the person you love is almost unattainable. However, not all expectations are lost – cruise ships regularly offer an assortment of couple’s activities. 

Travel sickness is a genuine possibility, though they generally neglect to mention it in the cruise commercials. It doesn't happen to everybody, but it's much more common than many people realize. Those stepping onto a ship for the first time often have a rude awakening waiting for them. 

Some people are more sensitive to the endless rocking motion and are more inclined to experience seasickness. In the most severe cases, medication doesn’t work, and the poor passenger experiences headaches and nausea throughout the entirety of the cruise. 

Whenever a couple goes on a cruise, at least one of them is usually fantasizing about having a heartfelt encounter complete with the icing on the cake – the iconic Titanic moment. There is something undeniably magical about standing together at the bow, sunset in the background, and the endless ocean stretching out ahead. 

As demonstrated by the photograph beneath, recreating the Titanic scene isn’t as epic as it seems. No matter how solid a relationship is or how keen each partner is to get their Jack and Rose on, the ships simply aren’t designed like the Titanic anymore. 

We expect the luxurious ship's crew to be similarly dignified and accommodating. Their sole reason, to us, is to serve the passengers, and we like to think they make the most of their job. 

We've revealed how minuscule the passenger rooms can be, so it should come as no surprise that the crew's living quarters are even tinier. They don't get lavish rooms, and on top of this, they’re usually housed deep down in the belly of the boat.

Let's face it, we have sympathy for pirates thanks to watching films like Pirates of the Caribbean, and this puts a rather glorious image in our minds when we think of what we may encounter on the high seas. After all, who wouldn’t want to meet Jack Sparrow?

In reality, pirates are nothing like Jack Sparrow. They certainly do exist, but pirate life is far bleaker than the film depicts. They don't have impressive ships, they don't have sassy parrot friends, and they don't go out on thrilling adventures seeking buried treasure. 

A holiday isn't complete without your favorite drink in your hand. Whether you’re into mojitos or virgin cocktails, you likely have a specific picture of what the beverages ought to resemble on a cruise ship; they ought to be served in tall glasses, gorgeously embellished, with a spot of lemon and a long straw.

In truth, the beverages aren't as impressive as we anticipate. The assortment is always more modest than what we expect, and elaborate mixed drinks aren't on the menu. On most cruise ships, you get your beverages from a self-service bar, and you wind up drinking them on plastic seats. The image below offers all the proof you need. 

Most people have imagined themselves lying by the poolside on a cruise ship, calmly reading a book and appreciating the calming sound of the waves and the delicate breeze rustling your hair. 

The pool on a ship may be awesome and surpass our expectations, but it also may be far too small to accommodate the crowd. Our main issue isn't with the pool but with different travelers on the ship. The sooner you understand you share the ship with others, the better. 

Everyone needs a little luxury at sea sometimes. And as it turns out, cruisin' is the solution for around 20 million people a year! In such a bustling industry, a qualified fleet of workers definitely needs to run it all. What do these folks actually do though, behind the scenes?

There are different levels of travel out there, and cruises are no different. Ultra-luxury ships exist, of course. And for workers, the perks are definitely better onboard these special vessels. Is it all extra fun and games, though?

First and foremost, what are these smiling faces actually paid? As it turns out, most positions offer an hourly wage. Altogether, it might add up to $1,200-$2,500 a month. But wait, the benefits!

And what about the lodging, captain? MTV Cribs never took a look at this lifestyle, did they? Let's take a peek below deck!

For the lucky few, single rooms do exist! Still, tiny is the operative word. Barely larger than the size of the mattress itself, officers get to enjoy this private heaven most of the time.

A major perk of any travel job is certainly the travel! In a globalized world, people have bigger bucket lists than ever. But oh, the expenses!

Most industries offer perks for employees directly related to the product, and it's always a lucky day when that means tropical cruises!

Cruise ship cabins often operate like wild college dorms, and that seems fun at first. After all, there's very little to do onboard besides pursue women and drink! But years of this lifestyle do take their toll, as long term workers explain.

Many might expect a power outage is no fun onboard a cruise, but the chaos is worse than it sounds. Much, much worse.

During downtime, naps are not always the first choice. Watching guests enjoy their own vacations make partying even more appealing! Who can really be a bystander when there's dancing and rum all around, all the time?

Friends are forever, and cruise ship family is no different. Floating out at sea away from civilization would be quite lonely without a solid posse, wouldn't it?

When seeing cruise ship flyers, what catches us, in particular, are the pools and the extravagant hot tubs. We envision unwinding in the hot tub without anyone else around, with a decent book in one hand and a cocktail in the other. Obviously, we’d then need to take the ideal picture to post on social media and make our followers jealous.

The only way you'd enjoy a cruise ship hot tub in peace is if you had one in your room. Just like the pool, you can guarantee that the hot tub will be consistently packed. 

For those sensitive to seasickness, no need to apply to this job. Frankly, even the shower experience could be nauseating!

Sadly, a big part of the job seems to be catching lovers in the act. Not in their rooms, of course. Public places seem to be just as popular with drunk, crazy vacationers!

It's definitely not unheard of for a big name to pop by for a performance or two on a luxury cruise. In these cases, special cabins and separate lounges and recreation are set aside for them. They even get to use the officer's facilities!

But do they stay on board for weeks after their performance? Are they actually stuck at sea with their fans?

Cruise ship workers report that they get hit on all the time by guests. It sounds like a great way to meet a cabin partner!

For anyone who has seen Titanic — meaning everyone — the prospect of a sinking ship is no laughing matter.

Even if the ship cruises the warm Caribbean waters, there are definitely sharks floating around at all times! Freezing to death or becoming a sea snack seems like an occupational hazard few would really sign up for in good times. Is that a big concern onboard? 

While most of us are smart enough to stay away from the ledge between life and the stormy abyss, there are a variety of people sober and intoxicated who like to live on the edge. Or even jump off the ledge!

With 3,000 guests onboard a cruise ship at one time, there are plenty of hungry mouths to feed at least three times a day. Keeping the customer happy means keeping their bellies full, but the staff gets their own tummy rumblings too!

External hard drives are may seem unnecessary to most of us, but what about the chronic sea adventurers? It seems that the concept of value changes a lot when one spends the year just floating around!

Some companies have noticed the crazy amounts of rum going on, employee-wise. As a result, the rules in the industry have been changing. Sad times, for the party animals on the crew!

Apparently, customers like to ask many of the same questions cruise after cruise. It gets predictable, but one inquiry seems like it's officially past the exportation date. No, none of the workers know Jack or Rose!

If you've never been on a cruise, you likely envision the rooms as being as lavish as a five-star hotel. You anticipate a luxurious room with top-of-the-line facilities and an amazing sea view. 

As indicated by some exceptionally baffled cruise passengers, the rooms may be much more modest than anticipated. Cruise ships look enormous outwardly, and they are, but they also house hundreds of passengers, which implies that not all rooms can be as large as the passenger might like. 

We generally assume a five-star cruise ship is equivalent to a five-star hotel, yet in reality, the two are so vastly different. We expect the dining hall, and the food, to be extravagant and lavish, with an enormous assortment of meals, a culinary expert directing the food, and a ceiling fixture fit for the five-star rating. 

In reality, the assortment at the buffet of a cruise ship often leaves a lot to be desired. Even so, the lines are almost always long. The dining hall regularly looks like a secondary school cafeteria. Once more, this depends a lot on the cruise selected – some of them offer a premium dining experience, but of course, this comes with a premium price tag. 

Bringing keepsakes back for our loved ones when we travel abroad has become a social tradition, and it's now viewed as impolite not to do as such. More often than not, these keepsakes are cheap, useless trinkets that end up gathering dust. 

As it turns out, the gift stores most people find on their cruise leave a lot to be desired. What they tend to find are cheap clothing stands on the street, with tacky shirts and shabby dresses that never get worn again once the cruise is over. More often than not, the ship carries you to worn-out tourist traps that all sell similar, overpriced items. 

If you've been on a cruise previously, you may know that the ship can't always dock at a port when it makes a stop. When this is the case, travelers are moved to shore in little groups by a tender (a smaller boat that is connected to the ship). 

The truth is, as you’ve probably come to expect by now, far less glamorous. Riding in the tender looks nothing like a scene out of Baywatch. Instead, you’re crammed into an ugly little boat with around 50 other passengers. Obviously, the boat ride is short, so it isn't cooled. Your only option is to open one of the small windows. Instead of being greeted with a gentle sea breeze, however, you’ll likely be hit with salt spray. 

While a few of us go on cruise vacations to revel in the ship’s amenities, the truth is, nobody truly appreciates ocean travel. When it really comes down to it, we're there to enjoy the extraordinary destinations promised to us by the cruise company. It's implied that when booking a cruise, you need to check ahead of time to see what these places are going to be like. 

Get ready for this fact: The tour destinations may be a failure, and you may wind up going through seven days of seasickness in vain. They don't generally take you to wonderful, secluded seashores (despite what the pamphlets imply) as the ships are simply too large to dock in such places. 

People always have their complaints, but cruise ship workers say they get some silly feedback. Whether passengers are mad at how loud the ocean actually is, or demand that the boat stays longer at a port just for them out of thousands of guests, the staff have a lot to deal with.